4 more to go...

ok.. now i'm having a week break away from all the stress and all... all the papers was fine.. except for math paper 2... damn.. i'm gonna fail my math... when i see the smile on janet's face... i can't stop myself from thinkin... wad m i.. y is it tat all members of my family are good in math.. in fact one of them is a mathematician.. and yet.. i'm such a disgrace to the whole family.. not onli i can't cope with my math.. i think i totally screwed up my chemistry paper today... my mind isn't on the right track.. i woke up the wrong side of the bed.. wad the hell m i and wad use is there for mi to continue living in the ever changing world with all the challenges ahead.. i can't even handle these simple task of studying... how can i cope with the outside world... i've let alot of ppl down... come to think of it... my parents have such high hopes on mi and yet i'm disappointing them... wat is done cannot be undone... no point crying over spilled milk.. the case of mi failing my o's kept on repeating... i'm realli gonna b so dead... i've no confidence in my english.. i screwed it up too... once my english is down.. everithing is gone.. all my efforts... down the drain... i will be the one left behind... although i've given thought abt wat i will do after i fail my O's... i will go nafa... it's not easy to get in put i juz have to give some hope to it.. laselle-sia... mayb my second choice.. misdemeanor call mi to choose nafa juz to pei her... ... or i will go NS.. total nightmare... have to serve 2.5 yrs cause of my size and i have no diploma so no priviledge given... nah... today's blog is juz rantings... bug off... if u read until this point and u got sick of it...

today went to mr san studio see him... still the very carefree old man... laughing and joking and all... had a veri nice long chit chat session with him in his studio and in the cafe... after that went to parkway... stone there from 3 till 7.. juz plain chatting with ris and jas... talked alot.. will b going there tml to do art...
after probing some question to mr san.. i realli feel like renting a room and have a real space of my own... i realli wan it badly... my house is congested and is shit... i have no freedom no nth... everithing is being controlled.. i have to face certain ppl everiday... it kinda pull down ones mood... bah... gonna stop here... very lengthy...